April 7th, 2015


wanted to do a not-secret more-vanity blog to keep track of how i'm going and also game dev. that maybe people read. on a service where people expect long-form text posts. remembered this one, hence this post.

i've been acting weird lately. 2015. turn your shame into slime. and do not listen to bad advice from weak nerds. this is the tocky mindset in 2015. but i've been obtuse, opaque. where i could be more opalescent.

this is what i need in a community:

-support. obviously. everyones a troll on forums, even the moderators. im used to the new flesh. no moderators, just you and your followers and the gods. we can moderate ourselves.
-willing to read. like, the things i'm making are gonna be a little hard to parse. but dividends, for the careful student.
-reverence for tocky. because i have learned these things and am qualified to teach them, and even if i'm not clear what they are - well fuck it, i'll list that also. thats the next post.

i'm back at uni, half way through the first semester, and the classes im in, they may be losing their lustre, and i'm trying to keep on top of myself and the work, which today is:

- python 'take home task' which is drawing little sigils. can do this but im really not keen. writing code as directed by your moderator. lame. python is such a free lanuage, doesnt need all this constraint.
- a presentation on the bottle shop app, TIPSY, designed with my team from the team design class. good dudes. presented today, because the unending annual celebration of the death of christ took the end off last week. should be fine. we got the goods.
- a 5000 word report with hella apendices and shit. on those little RFID smart cards. and their application within a specific company. too much moderation again, i'd much rather write about any other technology than this. but whatevs.

so what it always comes down to with assignments is 'do this one specific thing and do it the way i tell you. use your creativity, but use it the way i tell you.' even while they're excited to teach us how you motivate a person, which is not that. tey teach us the new way and then they have us work the old way.

What I Know So Far

so what am i able to teach, then?

there are the five sons:

-writing (and i could stand to know a lot more about stories. study keightley, study grimm, 1001 nights, etc. )
-code (build. web dev as well, the interface between web and games is pretty opaque. how computers actually work. )
-music (which i never have time for. )
-design (everyone thinks they know this. at best i know it more now than before. )
-art (animation, color theory, perspective, etc. criticism. how to see.)

anyway, i can try to teach all this stuff, im some kind of expert on all this stuff (well, probably not music). but we can spread ourselves too thin this way, and not really achieve anything.

so the main three sons for me are design, code, and writing. sorry other son, perhaps every other developer will serve you better. these other sons are lovely but we spent too many resources on them already, and starve the others. minimalism would serve us better. minimalism against what? against final fantasy, to be honest. lets have more fantasies after than one.

what else? what i want to teach is justice, philosophy, and statesmanship; we will need these. build a community that supports itself. and how to run that on a skeleton crew. so chaos theory as well. am i qualified to run this and teach this? probably not. but lets do that anyway. qualifications dont really mean anything.

so tocky-brand social justice, what is that.

first of all, know history. know the history of philosophy, if you dont want to learn this - well, i will learn it for you. but it can not be ignored, the lessons will have to get through, because we done had these arguments already and we cannot fail to listen to the learned persons who came before us, we do not have this option. that means first of all, the physicists, the sophists, the platonists, and the stoics. and then the enlightenment dudes. and the eastern canon, about which i know almost nothing. and the kooks. theres a lot to learn. but we must learn it because we must learn how to argue. because we're arguing anyway. but most people are sophists and we need more platonists and stoics. and buddhists and taoists, is my guess. fewer abrahamists imo but if we must have these then lets have more focus on the lessons and less on the prophets and the worship of these. none of you nerds are going to heaven.

second of all, know feminism. we can hardly have a social justice without a knowledge of feminism. the feminisms, there are many. three waves, but really this waves model gives us a sense that things are moving forward but in truth... we are stagnant. if you want to feminism you must fight all feminists, and this is just to begin with. you must fight all the sjwahs and all the anti-sjwahs, nobody agrees on anything.

but um, if the fems can agree on anything its that all men are gross. and the antifems seem super excited to prove this to them. so we need that third kind of heat: the non-binary sort.

there are three kinds of argument that i know.

-you have your MODERATION. shut the other guy down. delete him. everybody knows this one. moderation is weak because it says nothing. this is why forums are going out of style.
-you have ABSURDISM. which is recombination. show the guy that his one thing is really two things that are strange bedfellows. show that his two things are really one thing and not opposites as he claims. in short, show that the guy doesnt know what he's taking about. this is better because it asserts something, it shows that arguments can happen and we can make our own interpretations. and then,
-you have ACCELERATION. keep pushing towards your conclusion. whether the other guy gets it or not. they will have many chances to get it, and you are not his dad. assert a thing, assert your thing.

you can see why i like these better. its a weapons triangle: moderation beats acceleration beats absurdism beats moderation. but moderation only works if you're on top, or if the other guy believes you are. these others only work if you are right, and they help you to rise up and destroy the moderator in your head (mods willing). it is better to be right than to be on top, though.